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[16 Mar 2006|02:10am] |
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incubus - i miss you |
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wow.
live journal. welcome back to my life. its been 10 months since i wrote to you last. this time last year was the worst time in my life and images of it have been going through my head like wildfire. i miss live journal. i felt trust, friendship, love, and meaning in this thing we call a journal. now i feel like i have nobody who trusts, no friends to listen, no meaningful relationships that i can call my own. THEY HAVE ALL BEEN WASHED AWAY. and as i say that i start to cry. i feel that my life was split into two pieces and im stuck in the middle hopping from one to the other. but there is nothing stable about my life except for my job and my bad habits. i feel that i have become such a horrible person, such a monster that no man can cage up. i feel cold. trembling. friends taken away by girls. friends taken away by parents. friends taken away by jobs(especially me). friends gained by loss. friends gained by cheating.stealing.lieing.
i was thinking about it tonight as i sat infront of my job and waited for my ride. i have nothing in this town anymore but a couple of friends that make my life, whom i see everyday. yes they may be fun but they arent friends i can put trusts in like a few that i had. i need to get out of this town and go to san diego. i dont want these people anymore. i want something new. i need to start over. my new years resolution (to be a better person) will have to start when i move away. i know i will miss everyone because of some memory of somesort, but i need new everything in my life.
as i read my friend stacy's post tonight, it said "...Do I stay with what I know best or do I break away and make the last seventeen years just a vague memory?..." this hit me hard. 17 years of my life could be wasted by graduation. i just wish i had no regrets. i always say i dont. but fuck that. i do. i want my old life back. who could have thought that switching to another school could change someones life so drasticly. i love my new friends and they have helped me push my way through chatsworth. scott, mickey, allen, rob. you were here all summer and introduced me to your friends. but i wish i never fucked life up so bad in the first place. lazyness has taken over my life for the worse. well ok maybe not lazyness because i work my ass off everyday at work. but thats what im saying. i wake up. go to school. chill. work. come home. sleep. that my life everyday and i have realized that theres no point to it. theres no meaning to that life. im NOT!!! saying i want to kill myself but i just need a fuckin answer.
i feel weird writing in this because when i wanted to start writing i didnt even remember how to get to a blank entry page. i needed to get that shit off my chest. i needed someone to talk to and i think its sad that i had to resort to a fuckin energized box of wires. but anybody, or in my case, anything, that will let me ramble on, with the only thing that interrupts me are my tears, thoughts, and brain farts, will do just fine.
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| A CHANGE OF PACE |
[26 May 2005|09:18am] |
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mood |
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 Fuckin' Happy |
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music |
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A Change of Pace - No One Knows |
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Hello Hello Hello (wow havnt done that in a long time),
New Shit New Shit New Shit
A Change of pace is one of my new favorite bands and they are somewhat underground so not many people know about them even though everyone should.
"An Offer You Can't Refuse"
1.Loose Lips Sink Ships**
2.Death Do Us Part
3.Every Second**
4.Asleep At The Wheel
5.December
6.Know One Knows**
7.Home Is Where The Heart Is
8.A Farewell To A Friendship**
9.Chippie
10.Goodbye For Now
11.Queen Of Hearts
**FAVORITE SONGS
So i suggest that everyone who reads this post at least give the band a try and let me know what you think after you have given them a chance. if you want the link to an easy way to listen to them, here it is...
http://www.purevolume.com/achangeofpace
-Nick
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| Prom 2005 Recap |
[23 May 2005|09:29am] |
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mood |
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 Very Very Tired |
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music |
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New American Classic - Taking Back Sunday |
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Prom 2005 Recap
Granada - Would have been more fun if i didnt have to drive home at 5 o clock in the morning but thats ok, oh and the food was good, but it was the same at the next two proms i went to except for ND's who had teriaky chicken which was sooooooooooooo good.
Chaminade - Post prom was the shit because i got to play blackjack and run around on crazy moon bouncy things, and not to mention i was with Kim Milk and all of her crazy friends. the only thing i wish that was different would have been that all of the people we went to homecoming with went with us to prom(kim knows what i am talking about)
Notre Dame - After being to two proms the three weeks before, i was kinda bored of dancing and i felt bad for my date because i didnt dance but i was so sick and tired of dancing it wasnt even funnny. and i could count how many cherry cokes i had that night. But after the dance was fun especially since i was with wes that just made it that much more fun. We watched movies and watched chris rock do stand up comedy and that guy is so fuckin hillarious. and i suggest that you go and find his dvd "Never Scared". you will shit your pants it so funny. And the ride home was awesome because i think i recited every dane cook line i could ever think of and wes and i laughed so hard. And my dates mom is the coolest mom ever because she cooks for me and anybody that cooks for me i love. and she is incredibly nice too, so that a plus.
Thats it for my prom recap(the edited version). And i think i am done from school dances till about next years prom because proms are the only good dances. only because they are the most talked about and people actually enjoy going. so please dont ask me to a dance for a while, but if you forget that i just said that and you ask me anyway, ill probably say yes because i have CSN Disease (Can't Say No Disease).
**Thanks for reading my wonderful post and if anybody has any info on Rascal Flatts tickets please tell me so i can go.
-Nick
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| Memories |
[17 May 2005|12:53pm] |
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Bless The Broken Road - Rascal Flatts |
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"I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
Now I'm just rolling home
Into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you."
So i was listening to this song today and it really reminded me of the good times that the krew use to have and it makes me sad that most of us have gone our separate ways even though we do hang out shumtimes, its not the same because when we use to hang out we were (most of the time) all together and we always had fun, but it isnt like that anymore and i want it to be that way again. this song also reminds me of the country bash even though they didnt play this song it is such a good song and i suggest you download or listen to it even if you dont like country music.
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[06 Apr 2005|12:21pm] |
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Jessie and my Wetstone - Saves the Day |
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Hello everyone,
hows everybody doing, im doing alright i still miss all my peepz from alemany but ive made some pretty cool friends at C-Worth. "daaaaa". just posting to see how everyone is doing and how their spring breaks went. oh so recent news which i am not to proud of, i was let off at jamba so if you go in there dont expect to see me, but hopefully ill get a job soon already filled out some apps... hollister, AE, longs... so ill let yall know whats going on in the near future. So yeah hit me up on the celly or comment on my post to let me know how you are doin and ill try my best to respond because i dont get to go on the computer very often.
Peace Out,
Bliley
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[14 Mar 2005|01:03pm] |
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doing better |
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The_Deadletters - Hearts Sometimes |
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HELLOOOOO NEWBRUNSICK, I mean everyone
so sitting in 5th period doing absolutely nothing and this is the only site that the school lets you go on but i make it worth while. So just reminising of old times with the krew and hopefully ill be able to come to alemany on my spring break and see everyone but i dont know how spring break is going to work out, especially for my grounded ass. but just want to say hi to everyone and that i miss all of you and to let you know that im doing fine at C-worth and there has only been about three fights, one this morning which i didnt see but i knew the guy in it and i heard he fucked up the other guy but you dont want to hear about all of that shit. I dont know when i work again because i dont have my schedual yet but when i get it(sometime in the next couple days) i will post it on here.
Love you all,
Bliley
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| No Freedom 101 |
[10 Mar 2005|01:12pm] |
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depressed |
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music |
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Senses Fail |
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I miss my friends
I miss Alemany
I miss Freedom
I miss Driving
I miss Laughter
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[03 Feb 2005|12:00pm] |
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mood |
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lonely |
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Diamond rio - One More Day With You |
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hello everybody, havnt updated in a long time mainly because i am grounded. Life as i know it right now sucks so much; i am grounded, dont have a car, have to have my dad drive me everywhere, pulled out of the one place that makes me happy because all my friends are there(alemany), and that i have nobody to talk to. Thank you to all of you who care about me and supported me through these hard times i have been going through. I really have nothing to say, nothing to post about, mainly because i have nobody anymore. lately i have been thinking how Chatsworth will be a good change for me, but after reading everybodys posts today, i dont know how i am going to function at chatsworth without my friends and family(the krew). So this is my formal goodbye to all of my alemany friends. I love all of you and i thank you for all of the good times that we had and all of the memories that have been planted into my head, i will never forget them. I still be working at jamba juice so if you want to see me i will be there. and maybe ill be online soon, if my dad lets me use the computer. so once again, thank you for all of the good times.
Love,
Nick
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| NEW SCREEN NAME |
[22 Jan 2005|02:38pm] |
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mood |
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Tired as Fuck |
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music |
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Yesterdays Rising - Sidewalks |
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Hello everybody i need a new sn because mine sucks (dont make any comments about that). Right now i have 13 that i need you people to choose from and a star will be put next to the ones that are the 5 best.
1. Fight on 4 You*
2. Guilt is my Curse*
3. Unimagined Hero
4. Throw Away My Keys
5. Here I am
6. 1st Real Heartache
7. She Wont Sleep
8. I want 2 Save You
9. Done with Endings
10. Open Eyes 2 Drkness*
11. Evenings Sunlight*
12. Twilights Sunlight (Long)
13. Back 2 the Disaster*
please choose wisly :)
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| Thnak you's |
[17 Jan 2005|09:56pm] |
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Heaven - Yanou |
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Happy b day to my bro sithi once again.
Hopefully my b day will be just as memorable
Thank you to:
Sheen - For my delicious yellow duck with rainbow wings and my photo ablum
Rollie - For the Chappelle show season 1
Sithi and Wes - For my # 1 Grandpa hat
Jimmy - For the soco dvd
Tony - For the book
Yamu - For my cake
And for the rest of you that came and supported me and sithi on our birthdays and for listening to me when i told you that i didnt want anything:
Tania
Rachel
Chec
Robyn
Lou
Ali
Bobby
Anthony
Derek
Camille
Thank you to all who showed up, the night would not have been the same without you :)
Love,
MR. BlEEN
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| "Never coming home, Never coming home." |
[17 Jan 2005|02:19am] |
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High on Life |
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My Chemical Romance - Ghost of You |
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Hey errebody, its 2 19 january 17, 2005, yes that is sithis b day but he is sleeping right now and i am not tired because i had a lost... energy drink so ill be up till tomorrow morn when we get up for the sunrise. sorry i havnt posted in a while the week went by really slow and i wasnt on the computer at all, so im updating on sithis new comp (which is very fast), because i have nothing else to do. so im here sitting in the chair talking to 2 different shannons, one who is incredibly hott who goes to granada and my sister shann who is fighting with eric as usual. very good week considering its my bday week, and i was working at jamba juice as usual and natalie siordia came in to get a jamba and i love fuckin natalie siordia with a passion. that made my week. and derek intoduced me to a new band, Yesterdays Rising. they have a song that has an instamental part, "the best 25 secinds of my life" - derek een. and My Chemical Romance is such a good band "ghost of you" very very very good song, highly recomended. well happy happy b day to my bro sithi, its his golden b day, 17 on the 17th. so wish him a happy b day if you see him on tuesday.
peace out,
# 1 grandpa
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[10 Jan 2005|08:24pm] |
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frustrated |
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Amy Dalley - Men Dont Change |
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hello, once again, my post is about work. Thats my life, who would have thought, me, nick bliley would have two jobs after searching all summer and not getting one.
Special thanks:
Asha for making my sister shrek report so good and funny.
Katy for making my weekend a very very memorable one.
Work (both jamba and vons) for making my life less fun without my friends.
Ween and Reen for visiting me at jamba :)
Dad for going camping this weekend so i could sneak out without getting caught :)
Dad for taking wyatt so i didnt have to deal with his shit
Hope everyone had a good weekend, better than mine with the exception of friday night/morning.
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[02 Jan 2005|10:02pm] |
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Pissed that school is tomorrow |
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Happy ending - Avril Lavigne |
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this is what i think of working all christmas break
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[01 Jan 2005|11:15pm] |
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tired |
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music |
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Nothing on but the radio - gary allen |
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hello everyone, happy new year to you all, i will see most of you in a few days, sorry to say, but i only speak the truth. i hope all of you have had a better christmas break then i di because i have worked everyday, except christmas, since december 23rd. yep good times. at least i am makin mullah.
new years wrap up: katy katy katy, thank you so much for making my new years somewhat intersesting, i shouldnt say somewhat, very interesting. shanns house was ok it would have been better if i could have stayed longer, :(. the video was awesome but ours still owned because we put so much more time, effort, and money into ours. thank you to Rachel, shann, jess, ali, tania, sithi, derek, and jeem for making my new years good. especially to rachel because she came to visit me at work today. :) and the lash factor because he came AFTER work.
have fun for the rest of your christmas break stay safe, and visit me at jamba :). bye
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[29 Dec 2004|02:44am] |
So its 2:17 in the morn, and for some strange reason, sithi and I always stay up really late when i come over. He is playing Knights of the Old Republic II, while i went on my usual escapade to 7-11 to get my nightly sugar high, as im finishing off my bag of gummy bears :). we made up a new phrase tonight,
NOOK NOOK and/or NOOK NOOK LA~LA
in which jimbo ho thought that our phrases were obnoxious, on the other end, sithi and i were cracking up.
if you are reading this right now and are saying in your head, ~NOOK NOOK~ just say it out loud and you will see the tein~ness on the spleen side on the other end of the spleen docks. you will hear the magic of these phrases and will come to school, see me and/or sithi and yell NOOK NOOK! and we will respond LA~LA!
THIS JUST IN!!! BREAKING NEWS! quote from sithi
"you should put a secret message in your post, saying alexa is hott." ... i think this is secret enough. no one will ever find this buried treasure.
Back to NOOK NOOK AND LA~LA's ... we will be up for a while boning yelling NOOK NOOK to each others orgasms. have a wonderful night sleeping all my young children.
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[27 Dec 2004|12:05pm] |
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so everything in my life has been pretty boring. its been work, work, work, christmas, work, work, than i got to hang with the crew. so it all revolves around work. christmas was gay because i was with my family, and that always sucks, but wes came over so we went over to sithis and dereks and played hacky sack. best part of the day, nothings better than playing hacky sack in a driveway, having car lights as our only source of light, and listening to STD. good times. then i worked some more. had derek and shann visit me at vons which turned out to be perfect timing because i was working in the floral/balloon dept. and was doing absolutely nothing. then we went to wesleys that night and watched "the girl next door" which is one bitchin movie. then we went to get food at carrows and i got so much fuckin food, as usual, and then i went home. good times, well for most of us. beach party soon. dont know when. its gonna be hott but cold at the same time. laters.
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| IM LAZY!!! |
[19 Dec 2004|10:22pm] |
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Ave Maria - Andrea Bocelli |
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Sorry everyone im to lazy to write about my very very very eventful weekend. Im Lazy Get over it. Friday -~- got a speeding ticket, saw sarah fernandez, went to sithi's, saw katy, had fun with katy (thanks for brightening up my weekend katy you did and awesome job especially after my wonderful ticket). Saturday -~- deep cleaned my car (crazy style ... pimp status especially with "tortuga", good times) Went to work at 5:30 PM - 1:00 AM slept Sunday -~- Worked 6:30 AM - 1:45 PM (yes 14 hours of work in less than 24 hours). came home, went to the gym. talked to kristin (who is in hawai'i ...that bitch J/P). and now im writing to my devoted friends. (if you have a problem with the comment "devoted friends", speak to my lawyer. Hope your weekend was better than mine, except for friday morning ... early early morning ;-). And Wes, please act on your emotions, please.
Please Pray for my mom, Janet Lynn Bliley, who has been in my mind especially this weekend because of an Andre Bocelli concert on PBS. Keep her in your prayers. Now here are the lyrics to "Ave Maria".
''Ave Maria
Gratia plena
Maria, gratia plena
Maria, gratia plena
Ave, ave dominus
Dominus tecum
Benedicta tu in mulieribus
Et benedictus
Et benedictus fructus ventris
Ventris tuae, Jesus.
Ave Maria
Ave Maria
Mater Dei
Ora pro nobis peccatoribus
Ora pro nobis
Ora, ora pro nobis peccatoribus
Nunc et in hora mortis
Et in hora mortis nostrae
Et in hora mortis nostrae
Et in hora mortis nostrae
Ave Maria''
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| "...99 Problem but a bitch aint one..." |
[16 Dec 2004|06:48pm] |
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mood |
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Uplifted |
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music |
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Points of Authority/99 Problems/One Step Closer - LP JZ |
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New Shit! New Shit! New Shit! New LP CD out and it is so bangin Collision Course with Jay-Z (Shawn Carter). this cd isnt their best only because it only has 6 songs on the actual cd but there is a dvd which i hav not gotten around to watching but i think i might tonight. So big big big shout out to LP for the cd that i have been cravin forever. Week has been pretty shity other than the fact that OUR GIFT IS GOING TO OWN!!! sorry to a certain person who has not had the best week and just to let her know that dani, sj, cindy, and i are behind you 100% and that we love you. Extra Extra 6:57 pm Thursday, December 16, 2004, dannie and shann are comin to see me at home since i wasnt at work yay! And i had a fun time with the baseball guys on wednesday special thanks to a person named David, and Jack. Thats it for me im out of here to go see shann and dannie.
"h to the izzo" "shizzle my nizzle" "keep my arms so breezy"
Peace out
BLEEN
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| Still Grounded |
[11 Dec 2004|09:53pm] |
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blah |
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music |
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Anything - I have a lot of spare time on my hands |
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Sup everybody,
I certainly hope you are having a wonderful weekend because i'm not. im still grounded and all that i have done all weekend was work and watch cartoons ... yay, riveting ... i went to work friday night, worked for a couple of hours and then visited with my friend nate because it was his last night at jamba juice. I came home and fell asleep at like 9:45 after watching a couple of episodes of The Family Guy. I woke up this morning and watched gay Fox Box Cartoons. The only two good shows on there are The Ninja Turtles obviously and F- Zero. But since i got up so early i watched, I can't even remember what shows they were because they were so gay. Oh one of them was called Winx, and it was about some fairies that were fighting some demons or something, it was stupid. Anyways, i went to work at 11:30 and left at 7:15, long day. I am home now and babysitting once again, and i work again tomorrow. so there is my weekend for you. Talk to you later.
Bye Yall
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[28 Nov 2004|03:10pm] |
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content |
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When you say nothing at all - Alison Kraus |
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Sup errebody, just thought I'd post before I went and got food and went off to work, and work like a wetback at jamba juice and i work till 10 so come and visit me. So last night was some crazy shiznit because shann got into a car accident and I was trying to listen to her story and calm her down at the same time, even though she was pretty calmed down for the most part. So I talked to her till about 12:20 then talked to sarah fernandia for a while. And while talking to fernandia and listening to kzla, shanns song (When You Say Nothing at All - Alison Kraus) came on the radio so I texted her and I think I made her feel better. :). Then I woke up this morning(with this feeling inside me ...) at 7:15 to go to church at 7:30 (still tryin to get on my dads good side). Came back home, wasnt tired but amazingly i fell asleep again. i woke up yet once again helped my dad with my sis' room while in the middle of watching football, and now im here talking to you. Having a relativly boring day but i hope it will get better at work, haha thats funny~a. Talk to yall later.
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i_feel_deep's journal